Ganpati
| Natural Sexuality of men
It is clear that men are not what they showcase themselves to be or what the society claims they are. Men do wear masks in order to survive as men. We also know that non-conformance has extreme consequences. This was one of the most important thing we found out during our more than 10 years of work with young men. Sex is the most critical issue in this game, and without doubt it single-handedly determines social manhood. The most intense pressures, mispropaganda and control by the society are directed in the arena of sex. The most steadfast but also the most suffocating fake masculinity masks of men are about their sexual needs and what the society misleadingly terms 'prowess'. In short, men lie about their sexual feelings, needs and desires. It is simply a matter of life and death for men. Men go through great lengths to kill, mutilate, hide and suppress all those sexual feelings that do not fit into what is required by the present trend of social masculinity. Men would not think twice before sacrificing their most basic sexual need if it does not tally with what the society expects from men. Men would die before owning their own true sexual feelings. It is funny because the image that men showcase is that they are overflowing with sexuality and that they just cannot control/suppress their sexual feelings for women. Of course the nature and extent of these feelings differ from a male dominated traditional society and an anti-man heterosexual society. In reality being a man is about forgetting what one really needs or wants. It is about being what the society wants you to be. . Natural sexual feelings of masculine men (known as straight in the west) are not what it seems. We had an opportunity to delve into the real sexual needs of men, through a chance to work with young men and boys, and we found that although they presented the face that the society wanted them to show, with a little effort, sensitivity and insight (which was only possible if you were a masculine gendered male youth yourself) you could reach out to the man behind all the hostile masks. And there was this struggling, suffocating being that could only be felt with your mind from the outside. Adolescence and youth is particularly the best time to explore this hidden side because once this phase is over, the male learns all the 'ways' of life and knows how important it is for him to wear his masks at all times, making any observation very challenging. No surveys or scientific researches of the kind being employed at present can ever get at this real man behind the masks. This is especially true of a heterosexual society which is extremely hostile and anti-natural-masculinity. The surveys will be nearer the truth if you live in a non-heterosexual, traditional society where male spaces are still intact.
Principles of male/ human
Sexuality
Primary
Sexual need: The primary sexual need of a person is his basic sexual
need. It remains in the fore ---the conscious part of person for the major
portion of his life, intermitted only by short spells of secondary sexual need
at times. - What sex and what gender (westerners will do well to remember that these two are different) will the person be inclined to forge emotional intimacy with.
- What sex and what gender will the
person be inclined to spend his life and his quality time with. - What sex and what gender will the person be generally comfortable with.
- What sex and what gender does the
person relate to, and wants to be a part of. Secondary Sexual need: The secondary sexual need of a person generally stays in the sub-conscious and don't come to the fore, except in specific circumstances and with specific frequency which may differ from person to person. The secondary sexual need does not determine the major characteristics of a person --- whether sexual or social. In general people are not inclined to form emotional intimacy with the 'sex' and/ or 'gender' that is part of their secondary sexual need. They are more likely to be only interested in having physical sex with such 'sex' and/ or 'gender'. The desire for such sex usually evaporates with the 'orgasm', and there is no inclination to bond or relate further. People are generally not very choosy about who the 'sex'/ 'gender' that is part of their secondary sex. I.e. when they need to have sex with a person who is part of their 'secondary sexual need' people are not very choosy. They are also inclined to change such partners frequently not caring to bind themselves for a longer term. Subconscious sexual need: Apart from the secondary sexual need there are several other forms of sexual need which remain in the sub-conscious without ever getting a chance to get out, except when for some reasons it is not possible to fulfill the primary or secondary sexual need, or if they are tampered with unduly. This may include things like 'exhibitionism', 'sado-machism', etc.
The fourth important principle of male sexuality --- rather of sexuality in general is that when the primary sexual need of a person is suppressed adequately, the secondary sexual need can be made to replace the primary sexual need, although with differing levels of success.
However, this comes at a price to
the individual --- and if practiced at a mass scale --- to the species as a
whole, although it may not be visible or direct, especially in the short run. The natural sexual need of men
Although men instinctively know this to be true, they do not have an empowered voice that can 'own up'. Therefore, in later sections we will attempt to provide unbeatable evidences to support our assertion. 1. For the majority (app. 85%)* of males: The primary sexual need in this group is towards other males. The majority of this group consists of masculine gendered males with their primary sexual need towards other masculine gendered males. The secondary sexual need in this group is towards women. The majority consists of masculine gendered males whose secondary sexual interest is feminine gendered females. Thus as a general rule, masculine gendered males (men), if left on their own, i.e. without undue social influence or pressures, will choose to live with other masculine gender males --- both as social groups and as sexual partners. Many from this group of masculine gendered males will at specific time and interval pick women for short intervals ranging from quickies to one-night stands to short term 'bonds'. This secondary need is more likely to manifest itself during the latter part of one's life, towards latter youth or middle age. Of course an unspecified percentage of masculine gendered men do not desire to have sex with women at all --- and they form the core of this masculine gendered male group, which keeps the group together. A masculine gendered male of this group will be extremely choosy in picking a male partner. They will find it difficult to be aroused by 'just any male' (as against the stereotype of gays who are supposed to "just desire any dick"). Under normal circumstances, they are not interested in one night stands with other males. When they choose to have sex with another masculine gender male they tend to develop a deeper bond which strengthens over time. On the other hand this majority group of masculine gendered males will be very indiscriminate in their choice of women. When they desire women, they will pick any one who is available --- as long as they are feminine gendered. This group does not get along very well with masculine gendered women, especially as sexual partners. This group loses interest in their women partners quite soon. They are not inclined to get romantic or cuddly or emotional in their sexual flings with women. This group's desired sexual activities with other males is not focused on penetrative sex --- in fact it is rarely practiced. Instead it consists of things like frotting, mutual masturbation, touching, holding and getting cuddly. Their sexual acts with women is generally limited to penetrative sex and usually does not include cuddling, use of mouth, or other forms of foreplay.
They are the most likely to be
inconvenienced by the very concept of marriage, and the bulk of 'marriage jokes'
are made with them in mind. A big part of this group consists of feminine gendered and 'meterosexual' males (e.g. males who are both masculine gendered and feminine gendered --- in our society their natural femininity may be camouflaged/ suppressed by social masculinity/ power that heterosexuality brings). This group of males relates with women, and tend to bond with them both socially and sexually. They do not feel ill at ease in the company of women. They tend to have an 'inner thing' with women, and tend to feel almost one of them. They perceive 'equality of women' as being 'women and men are the same', and are one of the strongest components of the 'vested interest group' of heterosexualisation. They prefer to live in spaces which are shared by women, even dominated by women. They take their sex flings with women very seriously and tend to get emotionally involved with women they sleep with. Hence they are also very choosy about the kind of women that they are attracted to. They are more likely to be attracted by masculine gendered, powerful, dominant women, and prefer to play the 'submissive' part. They tend to bond life-long with women, and look forward to marriage, unlike the first group. Their preferred sexual activities with women is not centred on penetration. Instead they tend to enjoy a lot of different activities with women, including giving mouth (called eating pussy), cuddling, touching and a lot of foreplay. They are not very inclined to be part of male groups and participate in the stuff men commonly do â including sports (they may like to watch a lot of sports though!), preferring to spend their time with women instead. This group has a secondary sexual need for males. But they tend to prefer males who are feminine gendered. Also their sexual preference for males necessarily includes anal intercourse (both active and passive). This need is usually short-lived and they lack the desire or capability to bond long term with males. This need manifests itself more commonly during their youth.
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